Sunday, June 21, 2009

Happy Father's Day-Memories of my dad

I wanted to say Happy Father's Day to all the great father's out there!!! I hope you all had a great day today.

Been thinking a lot about my own dad today who is unfortunately is very ill and at this point doesn't recognize his children.

I had only recently gotten to know him over the last four or five years.

It's a long story. Way too long to go into here and for now...Still much too painful for me to even write about...
One of the lessons since he's been ill is to try and focus on the positive.

I'm sure everyone says, it's easier said than done, but as they say. Life is far too short to focus on the negatives because you just never know.

One of the positives of my knowing him was only a couple of years ago.
I went to my sister's home in Texas to celebrate my nieces and nephew's graduations.
He initially wasn't going to go. But after lots of friendly persuasion, he did.

So glad that he did too. After some minor bumps in the road, it all and all was a very very happy trip! It brought my sister and I much closer than we had been. I also, got to know my brother- in -law, my two beautiful nieces, my nephew and my step mom pretty well.

He was very happy. Laughing, talking, telling us stories about his life on the road as a jazz musician. (he gave us all a cd too...very good!)

As I was on the plane going home, I couldn't help but wonder,what if I had known him sooner? Would all our lives have been different? What about my sister and brother's? Would how the three of us felt about him be different if he were this person we all met on this particular trip or would he have been the one he had all heard different things about over the years?

We'll never know.

Unfortunately, very soon after I got home, not only did my father have a stroke, but also later on that year, he was diagnosed with terminal prostate cancer.

The stroke left him pretty much without a lot of memories of any of us. The cancer is now extremely painful because it has now spread. He is now being kept as comfortable they can.

Today, I tried to focus on only the good things about him. His humor, his great musical talent, and how he was to all of us for that brief moment that we had him healthy and strong.

The past can rob you of soooo many things. What i've learned throughout this journey is for people to NEVER let one moment if you can go unnoticed with your children. However, how large or small that moment could be.

Because you just never know what the future could bring. Love and enjoy every moment of your family..

Love to all , Shell xxxxx

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